And the Winner for Best (Worst) Puns and One Liners Is… Eye Roll Please…


The Wall Street Journal had a story today about the science of Dad jokes, loosely defined as plays on words or corny one-liners delivered to offspring, often greeted with a chorus of groans.

The article explores whether there is something in dads’ biology that makes them slip into cheesy comedy once they have children. One professor and psychologist explains that even terrible dad jokes may bring a father and child closer. The limited research on the subject suggests that fostering a sense of humor and playfulness while parenting may also help children learn how to cope with the everyday trauma of growing up.

“Dad jokes tend to be calming, not angry, and are simple enough that anyone, even a little kid, can get them,” says Robert Pierce, a professor at the University Counseling Center at the University of Rochester in New York and a psychologist in private practice.

Puns have also given researchers insight into how the left side of the brain engages with the right side.

But enough of this science mumbo-jumbo, let’s get to some of the dad jokes from the WSJ. For once, the comments section was enjoyable to read.

  • Two guys walk into a bar. The other ducks.
  • A mushroom walks into a bar. The bartender says he can’t serve him. He says, “Why not? I’m a fun guy.”
  • Did you hear about the dyslexic who sold his soul to santa?
  • A dyslexic guy walks into a bra.
  • “Which weighs less, a hippo or a Zippo?” “The Zippo, it’s a little lighter.”
  • DAD: I was just listening to the radio on my way in to town, apparently an actress just killed herself.
    KID: Oh my! Who!?
    DAD: Uh, I can’t remember… I think her name was Reese something?
    KID: WITHERSPOON!!!!!???????
    DAD: No, it was with a knife…
  • What did the Dalai Lama say to the hotdog vendor?  Make me one with everything.
  • Why did the chicken cross the playground?  To get to the other slide
  • What did the buffalo say to his son before he went off to college? Bison…
  • Two cannibals are eating a clown.   One turns to the other and asks “does this taste funny to you?”
  • Why was the pencil broken? Never mind, it’s pointless.

Twitter even has a hashtag for #dadjokes, and one twitter user is @BadDadJokes:

  • Apparently, you can’t use “beef stew” as a password. It’s not stroganoff.
  • My wife’s leaving me because she thinks I’m obsessed with astronomy. What planet is she on?
  • I’ve forgotten all my boomerang jokes, but I’m sure they’ll come back to me.
  • My dad always told me “don’t be quick to find faults”… Good man, terrible geologist.

And if you haven’t seen them yet, YouTube has a series of videos featuring two comedians face off by telling dad jokes to each other. The first one to laugh loses. Winner with the most points wins.

Here’s one with Will Ferrell and Mark Wahlburger, part of a promo for their movie Daddy’s Home 2:

One of my favorites: Did you know that in King Arthur’s time one of the knights of the Round Table collected taxes? His name was Sir Charge…

Long live Dad jokes…

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