A Little Break-Up Humor…

During my accounting lecture yesterday, we were talking about how to account for interest expense (I’ll stop right there, I don’t want to lose my audience that soon).

On one of the PowerPoint slides that one of my colleagues had put together, he had inserted the following joke:

Why did the banker break up with her boyfriend?

  • Because she lost interest.

Most of the students were able to guess that one, probably because we had just been talking about interest.

But most of them did not get the follow-up:

Why did the lawyer break up with her boyfriend?

  • Because he lost his appeal.

The two jokes went over so well (not), that I decided to look for more break-up jokes, and I came across a whole page of them, so I thought I would share a few of my favorites. Feel free to groan whenever you want…

Why did the girl break up with her staunch republican boyfriend?

  • Because he had to be always right.

Why did the guy break up with his tennis-playing girlfriend?

  • Love meant nothing to her.

Why did the girl break up with her stonemason boyfriend?

  • She took him for granite.

Why did the biology teacher break up with the physics teacher?

  • They had no chemistry.

Why did the astronaut break up with his girlfriend?

  • He just needed some space.

Why did the lion break up with his girlfriend?

  • He found out she was a cheetah.

Why did the dustpan break up with the broom?

  • Because it was sweeping around.

What did the electron say to the proton when it broke up with the neutron?

  • β€œHey! Stay positive!

”Why did the boy telephone and the girl telephone break up?

  • There was just no connection.

How to break up with your girlfriend: a two-step process:

  • Step 1: take off your glasses
  • Step 2: say: ‘I’m afraid I can’t see you anymore!’

My girlfriend threatened to break up with me because of my obsession with the Monkees. I thought she was kidding…

  • And then I saw her face.

77 thoughts on “A Little Break-Up Humor…

  1. Oooh you didn’t! Did you hear me groaning? You were anticipating my reply, weren’t you. 😢🀚! BUT yes, I was smiling! How can I not smile when you play a Monkees song! Especially that one!

    Liked by 2 people

      1. When I was a college freshman, I had a history teacher who cracked a lot of jokes. Some were pretty good, and others were pretty corny. His name was Don Shannon. Don’t ask me for the names of any of my other professors. But I’ll never forget him.

        His lecture hall was always packed, with many of the students just visiting, and not formally enrolled in his class. I learned a lot about California history from him (the subject that he taught) because he made it so much fun to learn.

        I think accounting can be fun to learn, also, if you use humor and such to keep it interesting. So you never know what sort of lasting impression you’re making on your students.

        Liked by 2 people

      2. I agree that humor can help; I’ve gotten much better at not taking myself too seriously… It may be this Shannon guy that sparked your interesting topics like The Chinese Cultural Revolution and California…

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Great humor but corny. Break up jokes are so corny. How corny are they? So corny I had to share another musical one.

    What do you say when you break up with an electrician?
    Watt is love?

    Baby don’t hertz me.

    Don’t hertz me.

    N-ohm-ore.

    πŸ˜„πŸ€£πŸ˜‰

    Liked by 1 person

  3. A friendly word of advice, stick to juggling…😁 But to stick with the theme, I offer the following humor:

    An accountant decided to leave his wife one day. He left her a note saying, “Dear Jane, I am 54 years old and I have never done anything wild. So I’m leaving you for an 18 year old blonde model. We’ll be staying at the Sheraton.” He then packed his things and went there. When he arrived at the Sheraton, there was a message for him from his wife. It read, “Dear John. I too am 54 years old. I have followed your example and am staying at the Hyatt with an 18 year old Italian hunk. And I’m sure that you, as an accountant, will appreciate that 18 goes into 54 many many more times than 54 goes into 18!”

    Liked by 1 person

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