Beer and Clowns Don’t Mix Well

It’s an odd story, but as a proud member of a group that is often ridiculed for no apparent reason, one that I can relate to.

Not all the details are in, but apparently a clown is responsible for a huge brawl that broke out on a cruise ship.

Here’s an excerpt from today’s New York Post (with my comments in BOLD CAPS):

Passengers on a British cruise ship descended into a bloody mass brawl — after someone in a clown costume showed up at a black-tie dinner on board, according to reports.

I CAN REMEMBER FIGHTS BREAKING OUT WHEN I SHOWED UP AS A CLOWN AT KIDS’ BIRTHDAY PARTIES. I REALIZED LATER THAT LITTLE KIDS DON’T ALWAYS KNOW THE BEST WAY TO EXPRESS THEIR DISAPPOINTMENT.

According to UK TV journalist Richard Gaisford, who was on the P&O Cruises ship, Britannia, as it headed home to the UK from Norway tweeted: “Witnesses told me they were so frightened they had to hide, as family groups fought.”

FORTUNATELY, THIS DOES NOT SEEM TO SUGGEST THAT THESE WITNESSES WERE FRIGHTENED OF THE CLOWN, BUT OF THE BRAWL THAT WAS TAKING PLACE. SINCE MOST STORIES ABOUT CLOWNS FOCUS ON THE IRRATIONAL FEAR OF CLOWNS THAT MANY PEOPLE HAVE, I’LL SCORE THIS AS A PUBLIC RELATIONS VICTORY FOR CLOWNS EVERYWHERE.

Gaisford also tweeted that the brawl started because of the “clown” arriving at the formal event. This upset one of the passengers because they’d specifically booked a cruise with no fancy dress.

I NEVER KNEW THAT A CLOWN OUTFIT WAS CONSIDERED FANCY DRESS. MAYBE I SHOULD BREAK OUT MY COSTUME (SHOWN ABOVE) AND TAKE MY WIFE OUT FOR A $$$$ DINNER.

As one passenger put it, most onboard were “perfectly civilized and nice individuals; it was just ruined by a few drunk idiots.”

I GUESS IT JUST SHOWS THAT BEER AND CLOWNS ARE NOT A GOOD COMBINATION.

THE ALCOHOL COULD BE JUST THE SPARK TO BRING BACK ALL THAT SUPPRESSED ANGER YOU FELT AS A CHILD WHEN YOU FOUND OUT THAT THE ENTERTAINMENT AT YOUR FIRST-GRADE PARTY WAS A CLOWN.

I HOPE THERE’S A FOLLOW-UP TO THE STORY WHERE THE CLOWN TURNS OUT TO BE THE HERO.

HE BREAKS UP THE FIGHT, BRINGS COMFORT TO THOSE WHO WERE FRIGHTENED, AND PUTS ON A SHOW OF A LIFETIME.

OF COURSE I’M NOT OPTIMISTIC OF SUCH AN OUTCOME, BUT I’LL JUST BE HAPPY IF THE CLOWN DOESN’T GET ARRESTED FOR BEING A PUBLIC NUISANCE.

P.S.You can read more about my experience as a clown by clicking here.