Airline Humor

It’s been a tough week for Boeing, with the crash of one of its planes followed by the decision of the FAA to ground Boeing’s entire fleet of that particular plane.

As might be expected, there was a great deal of discussion regarding passenger safety as a result of the crash and what airplane manufacturers and airline companies can do to improve safety.

For anyone that’s flown, we are all familiar with the brief safety overview that is provided before departure, either by video or by one of the flight attendants. And I am sure many of us have experienced a dash of humor added to such safety presentations.

The Wall Street Journal had a story today questioning whether there should be humor when providing such info; does such humor downplay the serious nature of passenger safety, or does it make it easier for passengers to remember the safety details.

There is some data to back the value of the humor. Research conducted in Australia a few years ago found that only one-third of passengers could recall “key safety messages” in preflight announcements. When humor was added, retention rose 13%; when celebrities gave the briefing, it went up another 5%.

I personally enjoy airline humor; I like it when it seems as if people are having fun with their jobs. The WSJ story was full of some funny lines, so I thought I’d share a few of my favorite ones, as well as some additional ones I came across through a Google search.

  • If by chance your life jacket does not inflate, grab your neighbor and hang on for dear life!
  • Let’s be honest, only those of you who paid the extra $49.99 get any oxygen.
  • For the 0.0001% who have never operated a seat belt . . .
  • Please be careful when opening the overhead bins because shift happens.
  • As the plane is taxiing to the gate the pilot announces “We are currently recruiting people to clean the aircraft. If you wish to volunteer then please stand before we have come to a stop.
  • Sorry about the bumpy landing. It’s not the captain’s fault. It’s not the co-pilot’s fault. It’s the Asphalt.
  • Thanks for flying with us today. We hope you enjoyed giving us your business as much as we enjoyed taking you for a ride.
  • We are pleased to have some of the best flight attendants in the industry. Unfortunately, none of them are on this flight.
  • To activate oxygen, simply insert 75 cents for the first minute.
  • No smoking is allowed, not even in the toilets. Don’t be naughty in our potty. If you do there is a $2,000 fine, and if you had that kind of money you’d be flying United instead of Southwest.
  • In reference to oxygen masks:- “Please help yourself before helping small children or politicians.”

And if you have not seen it, here is a video that went viral of a Frontier Airline’s safety overview:

*image from Job Shadow


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