We’ve all seen them. TV commercials for prescription drugs that last about 90 seconds, with 75 seconds of the commercial devoted to describing the potential side effects.
Here’s a clip of a Jeff Foxworthy routine where he captures the over-the-top nature of these commercials.
But as I was watching one of these commercials on TV today, I thought why should such warnings be limited to prescription drugs. Perhaps all products and services should come with such warnings regarding potential side effects.
And then I thought I need to practice what I preach, so I’ve come up with a list of potential side effects associated with reading my blog on a daily basis:
- depressing thoughts such as “I’ll never get those five minutes back” or “my time would have been better spent trying to stick a six-inch replica of the Empire State Building up my nose”
- a desire to throw your computer, iPad, or smartphone across the room so that you never have to read another Borden’s Blog post again
- rage-filled outbursts cursing your kindergarten teacher for having taught you how to read
- a desire to file an injunction to prevent me from ever blogging again
- falling asleep in the middle of reading Borden’s Blog
- a desire to do physical harm to people such as Tim Berners-Lee and Mark Zuckerberg for having made the Internet so user friendly, thus making it too easy for people to share their thoughts and opinions
- a potential 10-point drop in your IQ after having read Borden’s Blog, much like the feeling this guy had after listening to Billy Madison give an answer
So there you have it; you’ve been properly warned.
I hope this will serve as the motivation for other goods and services to do the same.
Borden's Blather 